There’s a moment in late summer when the hedgerows seem quieter. The swallows gather on the wires, restless for their journey and the garden shifts from abundance to seed. It’s a season of letting go and for many parents, it mirrors a personal change: the moment the nest feels empty.

When children leave home, whether for study, work, travel, or to set up their own lives, it’s a huge shift. It’s not an illness or a failing, but a natural stage of life and can stir up a surprising mix of feelings. Pride in their independence. A deep ache for the everyday closeness. Relief at having more space and sometimes, a quiet uncertainty about what comes next.

Some people feel it more than others. Those with daily rhythms around your children’s needs, or you’ve waved off your youngest or your only child. For others experiencing life transitions like menopause, retirement, bereavement, or shifts in relationships, impacts can feel even bigger.

Parenting isn’t just something you do; it’s part of who you are. When that role changes, it can leave you feeling unmoored. There might be moments of grief, worry about how your child is coping, or a sense of “Who am I now?” Relationships at home can shift too, as you and your partner, or you alone, adjust to a new way of living.

And yet, over time, many people find that the empty nest isn’t empty at all. It’s a space that can be filled with new things. Rediscovering hobbies, nurturing friendships, travelling, learning, volunteering. The relationship with your grown-up children can evolve into something richer, more equal and rewarding.

I often think of this stage as a seasonal turning. As nature rests and renews between cycles, this is a time for nourishment. Physically, emotionally and creatively. Herbs can be wonderful allies here, helping to steady the heart and mind. Lavender is calming and grounding. Chamomile soothes tension and invites sleep and lemon balm can lift the mood while easing nervous energy. Yarrow has a long tradition as a protective herb, helping to strengthen emotional boundaries. At the same time Passion flower can quiet those looping thoughts that keep you awake at night.

If you’re feeling the shift of an empty nest, know that you’re not alone. This is a tender, transformative season, one that holds space for your next chapter. If you are in need of support, herbal remedies can offer gentle, grounding ways to help you navigate this new phase with resilience and grace.

Holding Space: how the empty nest becomes full again.

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